In parts I and II of The Consequences of Seeking Love Before Your Purpose, I shared a few unfortunate results of seeking love not knowing what you purpose was. In this blog, I want to share a five reasons why it would be beneficial to you to seek your purpose before seeking love.
1. You have the opportunity to pursue what you’re passionate about without distractions. Being in a healthy relationship isn’t necessarily a distraction but you do have to devote your time and energy into sustaining it. A plant cannot grow without water and sunlight, nor can a relationship without communication, time and intimacy. This can become difficult for the person whose passion requires them to devote a 100% of their time into a project, at least until they can get the hang of things. I’m glad I was single writing my novel. I wouldn’t have been able to share my time with someone else…maybe now because I know how to manage my writing schedule.
2. You get to learn more about yourself seeking your purpose. Being single is a wonderful opportunity to explore who you are, to be conscious of your strengthens and weaknesses, to work on the things within you that could make or break your next relationship, equally important, you have the chance to develop PATIENCE! I had to face a few issues within myself that were affecting me as a person. It wasn’t comfortable facing my issues or shall I say, admitting that I had them, but I had to understand foundations that I came from that helped shape me as a person so that I could change the things about me that I didn’t like. Many of us don’t come from great, supporting backgrounds, like myself, and that’s okay. But just as long as you understand where you come from, that will help you to not repeat the things you saw or experienced. Spend sometime with you so you can understand you. Date yourself single person.
3. For us men, it’s extremely important to develop stability in three areas of our life, and I’m sure it is for women too. With that being said, during your time of being single, you also have the opportunity to develop financial, emotional and spiritual stability. There’s nothing like bring something to table that you potentially significant other can be proud or intrigued of.
I believe having financial stability is self-explanatory but to the one who lacks self-esteem or who needs to be affirmed 24/7 of who they are, you’ll drain a person out needing confirmation on a daily basis. I’d runaway from Kerry Washington if she was like this. But when your emotionally stable, its because you know who you are and you know what your value is.
Spiritual stability equates to spiritual maturity. If you’re a person of faith, and your faith is important you, you want to be with someone who’s spiritual mature because they will understand you better, in my opinion. I don’t think I could be in a relationship with someone who lacks faith. We will be seeing life from totally different angle and responding to life challenges in a totally different way. Being in a relationship with a person who’s spiritually mature can take your relationship to great heights but at the same time I’m not saying that being with a spiritually mature person guarantees success. Chemistry matters. I believe people who spiritually mature know how to respond to relationship problem effectively. They consult God before they consult people. They will also pray with you rather than talk about you. They also understand how God loves, and in return, with their best effort, they will try to mirror the love that God shows them to you. Loving like God is extremely difficult, but it is possible.
4. You have the opportunity to not repeat the same mistakes you did in the past. As you can see, seeking your purpose means spending time with yourself. How many of us move on from past relationships or dating for that matter, and not reflected on the wrong you done to do better next time around? It’s imperative that you learn from your mistakes…who knows, you may get a second chance with that special person, and I’m sure they want to see a new you.
5. A person with purpose is a man or woman with passion and ambition. A person who is passionate and has ambition is attractive. Being around an passionate and ambitious woman motivates me to take things to a higher level, but if I’m with someone who just content with the mundane things of life, I’d get bored. Being with a person who is confident and who has a clear sense of direction of where they’re going in life is a plus. Wouldn’t you want to be that person who inspires and motivates others, especially your potential significant other?
Well, that concludes this blog series. Feel free to share this blog, as well as others, who may benefit from the things I write about. And as always, thanks for reading.