Loving a Woman Beyond the Surface Pt. II A. Developing a Spiritual Connection with a Woman

A woman of God desires to have a spiritual connection with a man because it gives her insight of how you will court her, what kind of foundation you will build a relationship on with her, and how deep your love-making will be once the both you say I do. –Melvin Davis

Cultivating a friendship is one way to get in a position to love a woman beyond the surface. And the other is developing a spiritual connection. A spiritual connection will separate you from the men of her past, including current pursuers who maybe trying to climb into the picture while you’re courting her. Men, you want to build a foundation with her that is pure, sacred, God-inspired and God-led, comfortable and secure. You don’t want to give her the option to look to her left or right, or pick up the phone when an old love calls.  Transparency and vulnerability are two keys that will unlock a place in her heart to touch her spirit.

There are a variety of things to talk about when you’re spending time with the woman you desire and praying about. What happened during the work-week, your favorite television shows, maybe sports, future goals and plans, family related issues, surprises or additions are all great topics to converse about. These discussions will stir good conversation, and provide opportunities getting a better understanding of each other. It will also show that you are in tuned and sensitive to what’s going on in each other personal lives, and that you two have the ability to empathize. Empathy is extremely important to a woman. But when you incorporate God into equation, it ushers in a different kind of atmosphere that is both romantic and sacred. In Part B, I will discuss the emotional impact that developing a spiritual connection with a woman has. Now let’s get into developing a spiritual connection with a woman.

  1. Be open about your relationship with God. Sharing your encounter (s), experiences and relationship with God is a way to develop a spiritual connection.

Whenever you share how much time you spend with God in devotion and prayer, all the things God has brought and helped you through, you’re communicating to her to her that God is the important thing in your life, and that you have a relationship with Him. It also reveals that you have structure in your life, that you’re not just roaming or journey through life aimlessly—with no sense of purpose and divine direction. This opens her eyes to see that you spiritual leader or that have the potential to become one. And if you have dreams or goals to accomplish, you will succeed at whatever God has called you to do. A woman will support what God has placed in your heart.

A woman will feel more secure and comfortable around when she’s the length and depth of your relationship with God. She wants a man to lead in her relationship, and she wants a man to pray with, which leads to my second point.

2. Praying together. Whether you considered this thought or not, praying with someone is a sensitive and private experience for many people. It can be uncomfortable when you’re not used to it. In a way, you’re exposing how you interact with God in private. However, there are benefits of praying with a woman who I think you should consider.

When you pray with a woman, she sees that you know how to communicate with God, which makes her feel comfortable and confident in calling on you for prayer. I don’t know about you, but for me, it makes me feel god when a woman entrusts me upon me to pray. It let’s me know that she trusts me enough to confide the matters of her heart with me. Trust and companionship means a lot to a woman. Praying together could lead to praising and worshiping God together.

3. Attending Church Together. Before I say anything about this topic, note: it’s not a good idea to invite a man to church to critique how he praise and worship God. I say this respectfully. It’s not your place to judge or compare how a man praise and worships God in comparison to you.

Attending church with a woman is another eye opener for her to see (not critique) how devoted you are to God, and that you’re not just a man who perceives God as a genie but you actually have a relationship with Him. She also has the opportunity to interact and fellowship with you in a sacred environment, which will bring you two closer.


4. Being Thoughtful. I wrote a blog on The Art of Thoughtfulness, in which I dabble into a slew of thoughtful gestures you can do that will put a smile on a woman’s face.  Here’s the link.

Thoughtful gestures will open a woman’s heart and cause her to perceive you as a man who’s considerate and unselfish. It will make her more vulnerable, lowering her guard for you touch her spirit. Furthermore, thoughtfulness makes her think of you when you’re not in her presence. She may even smile while she’s washing dishes, sweeping or vacuuming the floor or doing other domestic chores around the house. She think of you when she’s driving or listening to a song, whether gospel or secular. Thoughtfulness also opens her loving. I will also touch on this in Part B.

5. Practicing the 9 Fruits of the Spirit with her. I’m not going to list them all. They can be found in Galatians 5: 22.

When you bring joy and peace, kindness and patience, and love into her space, she will sense the presence of God in and around you. Some people call it your “aura” or “energy.”  Knowing this will again, cause her to pen her spirit to connect with her.

Stay tuned for part B.


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