Sometime around late October of 2011, things got really serious with the woman I was dating. The idea of moving in together suggested that she believed I was the one for her. I wasn’t quite sold on the idea. The signs of a snappy attitude and relationship patterns alarmed. Something told me I wasn’t the only who she wanted to move in with her. One day, I took a long walk. I needed some time alone to be with God. I needed a clear answer that I couldn’t question, one that I wouldn’t be able to second-guess. As I walked, I opened my heart up to God. I was desperate for a sure, clear answer. I was ready to handle whatever it was that he wanted to show me about the relationship. I found a table in front of a school and took a seat. I reflected of how things weren’t working out in Florida, my chances of finding a really good job would be better if I stayed with her, and all of my college buddies were nearby. Logically, I had three plausible reasons to leave Florida. 1) I didn’t like it. 2) I couldn’t find a job. 3) I didn’t have much of a social/support system. The wilderness is no joke. Everyday was like survival for me. Anyhow, I listened to a few sermons, prayed, and mediated. And then I gathered the strength to pray this prayer:
God, I want you to reveal to me if this woman is my wife or not. If she is, I want you to reveal to her that I am her husband. I pray whatever you reveal to me about the relationship, you reveal it to her, so that when we talk about the future, we’ll be on the same page.”
I prayed that prayer, and left it in God’s hands. Tears came to my eyes at this point, because that desperate and afraid to make a decision without clear guidance and direction. I just have to fear of living outside the will of God.
When I returned to her place, she came back twenty- minutes later, and talked about the relationship. The conclusion: We were better off as friends. The outcome kind of hurt, because of the time that was invested, but there was a peace about the answer to my prayer that felt it was the right thing to do. After that difficult conversation, I gave my two weeks notice at the part-time job I was working at, and dealt with awkward feelings of being around her until my departure. But within those two weeks, something special at work happened.
One night, I overheard a co-worker that I became cordial with mention to another co-worker, that she was celebrating her two-year anniversary with her boyfriend. I’m not a nosey person at all, however, for some reason, I was inclined to ask about her anniversary, which led me to ask her if she knew if he was the one. After listening to all of the events that had transpired in her relationship, I felt something wasn’t right. I sensed that she was unsure about him being her future husband, and that he may have been unfaithful during their relationship. So I asked her to pray the prayer that I prayed. And in that same night, she received an answer. She found some evidence that confirmed what I felt. I was amazed, shock that her answer came quickly. Perhaps her heart was open like mine, and she surrendered to God’s will—resulting to the same action that I taken. She moved out of their apartment and returned home. Never think your situations are just about you.
When I finally returned to Florida after wrestling with God, I saw why I was in that particular relationship in Virginia. One reason was to cross paths with my co-worker. Who knows what could have happened or how much pain she would have experienced if I’d never asked her about the two-year anniversary. Perhaps you’re seeing someone worthy of making a lifetime commitment with, or you’re connected to someone you have strong feelings for, and you don’t know if that person is the one or not. I challenge you to pray the prayer that I prayed. I’ve used this prayer again, and I received answers in a matter of days.
It’s not God’s will for you to live in doubt, or try to revive something he’s taken away from you. God wants you to have the best, and He will not hold back the answer you need to walk away from a relationship he doesn’t want you to be in.