Why I’m Really Not a Good Catch When You Look on the Surface

Yesterday, I received a message from someone who asked if I was taken. It’s a question I often get, considering my writing content, ideas and perspectives about love and relationships, Although I’ve answered this question several times, and once before in a blog, my answer this time, may be a bit more resounding in this post.

I’m still single because there aren’t too many women out there who are going to invest and commit to a man like me.  Why, because I really don’t have it altogether. I cannot provide the necessary means a woman needs to feel secure. I can’t finance a lavish and expensive lifestyle. At this point in my life, all that I have to offer is ambition, a novel on the way (LOVE AGAIN) and a dream—al of which that doesn’t suffice or cut it. I’m just a man with potential, but potential often doesn’t translate to “I wanna be with you.” It means: “I like your work. Stay focused; you’ll get there one day. I wish you well. Good luck (translation, Goodbye.”) And you know what, those women have concrete reasons and evidence to make that valid claim, when they’re looking on the surface. But what these women can’t see is that I have something more than a novel and a dream. I’ll get to that later 😉

I will never ask or persuade a woman to be with me. If she believes in her heart, that she should entertain a guy who has all what she wants, she should. In fact, I would encourage her to go the opposite direction of wherever her emotions take her. And, I’m nice enough to say a prayer for her. I would pray that she finds love, and all that she imagined and dreamed of. I understand that my situation in life is a unique one. I’m being prepared for where God is taking me, which now flows to the part of what I have besides a novel and a dream.

I have God on my side. I am man who’s walking in God’s divine purpose and will. I know where God is taking me, because I’ve seen it with my own eyes, in dreams and in visions. In fact, I had a vision yesterday. God has his hands on me, and I experience his divine presence daily. God has often spoke directly to my heart, have sent many people (strangers) in my path to help keep me focused on the bigger picture. These messages were confirmation and little reminders of how God is going to use me. He also reminds me of the foundation I will have: A foundation that’s strong enough for my purpose and love to stand on. My wife will have security, and she will be loved and adored. That’s a promise!

When I do arrive to that place of success in life, I do hope those women, who have viewed me in a positive God-fearing, admirable and respectful light, would still uphold the same perspective about me when I tell them “I’m no longer interested” or “I’ll pass.”  I rather wait for the woman God has for me, because I know she’s going to love me for me, and not for what I do or what I have. If love translates into an expensive bill, I don’t want it. I’ll pass. The next man can pay for her love and affection, and for her time and attention.

I am not a good catch when you look on the surface. But if the surface is all you’re looking on, our faith and trust in God are in two different places.

Comments: To be honest, it was challenging writing this blog. I am putting myself out there. But what’s more important is that I want you to see how God will use me in the future. I want you to see my point of reference and experiences that I will teach from about love and relationships in the future. More importantly, I want you to be a part of my testimony when I marry that special woman one day.






9 thoughts on “Why I’m Really Not a Good Catch When You Look on the Surface

  1. Anonymous says:

    I happen to agree with you Melvin.If a person only want to be with you because of what you can do for them then they are not the right one for you.I’m a firm believer that when God created you he also created someone just for you.You may have to go through a few wrong ones to get to that special someone so that you will appreciate her when she comes.The one who will compliment you,believe in you,encourage you and love you completely.We often look for what we can see but our real treasure lies within us.(Our heart) We have to quit looking with our eyes and listen to our hearts.God bless you

    • Melvin Davis says:

      I totally agree.

      I’m not worried, nor do I feel bad about where I’m at in life. I know what God is going do through me.

      Thanks for reading,and God bless you as well.

  2. Anonymous says:

    Melvin your forgetting why your the perfect catch.Your a God fearing man and any man that knows how to love the father will definitely know how to love others including his wife.From reading your post,you seem like you let your heart lead you and if that’s the case you can never go wrong when you follow your heart.A heart that was giving to you by our father.

    • Melvin Davis says:

      Hey. Thanks for reading.

      The title is my sarcastic way of communicating: I really know who I am in God 😉

      I am completely confident that I will become all is calling me to be. I know I will be very successful

      Thanks again for reading.

  3. charry love says:

    Thank you for being vulnerable in this blog, that side of you is really beautiful to see. What you have to offer in terms of what you write here, is really more than money or fame could buy. I wouldn’t trade a man like you for a lavish or expensive lifestyle because to me having those things without love from someone who adores you, supports you, and loves you unconditional means nothing to me. in fact it translates into an empty life for me.
    Let me add I like a man with potential because I know one day he will become a great man. And I don’t mind supporting him on his journey to success.

  4. Melvin Davis says:


    You’re welcome.

    I wish there were more women who think like you do. I still have hope that there are.

  5. Elba De jesus Llorente says:

    “I am not a good catch when you look on the surface. ” — I highly definitely totally disagree!! I OBJECT!! hahaha 🙂 What kind of woman who would not want to be with someone like you brother?? tsk tsk. Those kinds are blind! Well, I used to think that there is NO good men anymore in this world…, But I was wrong… You are one proof. haha lol. So now I believe that there is still.. soo same thing with women…. There is still a woman who will love you just the way you are, and not what you have and can offer… (Myyy! You have a big GOD to offer to her, what more can she ask for?) So, be still cause she’s on her way to you. I strongly believe God will give whatever your heart desires and will reward you……… 🙂
    One more thing…, “More importantly, I want you to be a part of my testimony when I marry that
    special woman one day.”<— This is a promise OK? Send me an INVITATION pls…… lol. (I'm serious) Cause. I wanna witness!! wohooooo… hahah Godbless u more bro. And I pray for all the success in your life and ur on-the-way novel 😉

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