love

I’m Not Looking for the Perfect Woman

I’m sure the majority of women who have been reading my posts feel that I have high expectations beyond this world. They may think I’m looking to be with a supermodel woman or she has to look like the woman that’s eye candy to many men. Or, I’m specifically set on being with someone of the same culture. That’s not the case. Beauty and love extends beyond the color of my skin. And a high level of physical attraction doesn’t promise love. It promises lust. Other women may feel they have to be where I’m at spiritually. That’s not the case either. While physical attraction and chemistry, good conversation and having a spiritual connection matters, I’m a down to earth simple guy who sees himself with a down to earth, fun and simple woman. My expectations are realistic but not watered down or negotiated for just being with anyone.

I’m not looking for the perfect woman because the perfect woman believes she’s perfect is too good for anyone else. She also feels that no one measures up to her.  She seeks every opportunity to highlight your weaknesses rather than praise you strengths. Arrogance and conceitedness blindfolds her. I don’t know any man who would desire a woman like that. If so, it’s for the same of looking good in public or for sexual purposes, if you know what I mean.

I’m attracted to women who are humbled, who seek to experience love on a spiritual level, and knows how to communicate. Communication for some means yapping uncontrollably. Sorry. My attention span isn’t built that way. In a lecture, yes, it’s expected. My mind wanders when the uncontrollable yapping happens, and I immediately lose interest. Communication means to be conscious of another in your presence. You are engaging them. Not yourself.

I’m not looking for the perfect woman because I’m not a perfect man. I noted in a previous blog that although I may seem wise and knowledgeable, driven and well rounded, spiritually in tuned to people and my environment, and well put together, I’m flawed. I’m a human being who tries to live everyday improving.  I’m glad I’m not the perfect man. That’s too much pressure.

I’m not looking for the perfect woman because I’m looking for a woman I can grow, build and evolve with.  Relationships are built upon the building and rebidding of each other. I’m well aware that many people come from different family structures and relational experiences. And some of those who family structures and relational experiences may have created insecurities or have made their heart callous. I enter situations to learn about that person so I can understand who she is today, and how far she comes into being a woman. It’s important to understand who a woman is so I can be aware and sensitive to the woman she is today, as well as her to her needs. Empathy, listening and understanding is important her.

I’m not necessarily looking for a woman who’s where I’m at spiritually. Once upon a time, I was not who I am today. However, what’s important to me, and what I listen and look for in a woman is her desire to grow in God through Christ. I maybe the reason she may grow spiritually. She could be the reason why God taught me to love with compassion, with patience, kindness, etc., and to her strengths to compliment my weakness. Relationships are supposed to bring balance.

If you’re looking for the perfect person, I suggest you take a deeper look into the mirror. A perfect reflection isn’t staring back at you. It’s an illusion. That perfect doesn’t exist because you don’t exist in the reality of your humaneness. If you were created perfect, you wouldn’t have to depend on or acknowledge your Creator. No one one would be able to compliment you or please you.

I dig humble woman. They are attractive.

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