under_the_moon_by_viktoriyabulgakova-d57k248
love

This Kind of Woman. This kind of Love

In our secret place, we hold hands, worshipping God in spirit and in truth

The oneness of our sacred union, the purity of our hearts and yielded spirits, makes it possible to experience God’s presence together

The love of God joins the love we have for each other, causing our spirits to cry in reverence

Words were not needed. Only the songs of our hearts

The sweet incense of God entered our secret place as we worshipped

We bow in the throne room, hearing the wings of angels

They hold glistening white garments

Heads still bowed, for the fear of the Lord is upon us

“Stand up,” said one angel of the Lord. “Fear not.”

Strength returning to our legs, our eyes beheld the glory of God’s servant

We put on our new garments with lifted hands of praise

Returning back to our home, our faces glow with glory of God and our eyes glimmer with fire

We lay, tracing each other lips. For neither of us could speak in this moment

I run my fingers through her hair. “Your beautiful,” I was finally able to utter

She smiles, standing to her feet, helping me up

Standing in the night outside, we behold the bright moon

Close and cozy, I kiss her cheek, then her soft lips

We didn’t have to say I love you in this moment

Our spirits spoke

I kneeled, kissed her hand and asked, “Will you marry me again?”

“Everyday, I would,” She rubbed my head.

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The Purity of Love

I dip my entire being into the basin of the Lord’s presence

I wish not to touch you with unclean hands

Or look or think about you with unclean thoughts

Or speak foul language from an unclean tongue

I only want to be and speak the language of pure love

Everyday I see a bride when I look at you

Grace, virtue, love, nurture, forgiveness, faithfulness, kindness and Christ emanates from your eyes

In your eyes, I also see myself, and when you look at me, you see the reflection of your glamour. We are one

Let’s walk on top of the water as we keep our eyes on Christ

He can save and hold us together in any storm

Let’s travel together in heavenly places and behold our eternal resting place

I hold your hand tight as we journey into God’s handy-work, hoping we won’t depart  from each other once we get here

We bow before our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ in worship, saying. “Holy is the Lamb.”

Tears form in our eyes as the glory of the Lord consumes us

“Holy is the Lamb. Lord we bless you. You are the Alpha and the Omega. Holy You are.

Hallelujah

We return from our heavenly visit, holding each other tighter like never before

 Kissing each other more passionately than before

Our fingers grace across each other’s face, enjoying the look of our youth that will soon fade, but we are joyful, because we know, in our eternal resting place, we’ll have new faces

Thinking about our past disagreements and tantrums, they don’t measure up to the bigger picture

The picture was our wedding day. The day we committed to not be divided or subtracted by the hardships and challenges of life.

I love you, my love

Kneeled at our bed, I kiss her hand and she kisses my forehead

The night ends with a spiritual kiss on unclean lips

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What You Don’t See

Ground your expectations of experiencing love in reality, and you will endure with patience and understanding, hardships that come with loving people.–Melvin Davis

Who you admire from afar, such as celebrities, people in power or of influence, others who have caught your eye on social media, characters you read in book or saw in a film, are often depicted in a perfect light. You’re attracted to the appearance of a person. What you see on the outside does enough justice for you to say, I’m interested” or I “envision” being with this person. Beauty or physical attraction to the eye isn’t wrong, however, that’s not the only premise you should base potential off.

The reality about relationships is that they aren’t perfect, because people aren’t. Relationships can get nasty, ugly and competitive, which ultimately depends on the individual’s relationship with Christ. You’re different person when you have on the mind of Christ. That’s another blog. Everyone is not in the “right” or “ideal” place in life, as they appear to be. It’s also true that you can arrive to your destination of success, have all the necessary tangibles for stability, yet there are emotional wounds beneath the surface. Perhaps there’s a pending conversation or feelings from your last relationship that needs to take place before you’re really an eligible candidate. Character flaws like arrogance, being unreliable, pride, ego, poor communication, rude behavior, and timidity are also traits some successful people have.  These are real current issues in a lot of people lives today. You may not see these shortcomings in a picture, dialogue exchange on social media, at the beginning stage of meeting a person, but they will eventually surface as you go beneath the layers.

It’s wise and fair to have an honest view about relationships before you commit to one. I understand that everyone wants to experience love and a healthy relationship. You can. I believe you will through Jesus Christ. It’s good to keep in mind that you should possess what you’re seeking and praying for in others. If you want someone in tip-top shape, it’s a great idea to look in the mirror. Making sure you’re eating healthy and exercising. If you want someone who can cook and clean, make sure you’re able to do the same. If you want someone who’s smart, it would be a great to posses some intellect of your own. I mentioned before, if you want someone who has a relationship with God, have one of your own. This is a short list of what I hear people expect from others. Having this mind draws a line of reality than fantasy.

 

 

 

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love

Cutting Soul-Ties: The Healing Factor

At the point of breaking a soul tie, is when you find out what you really feel for that person. It’s also a moment of going to God in honesty and asking him to sever the soul-tie.-Melvin Davis

A soul tie is like a having a guest who’s overstayed their welcome in your house. The house is your soul. The guest is the person who once had your heart. They moved on, but your attachment to them didn’t.  In the soul lie memories, experiences, events and moments that shaped who you are. It’s uncannily amazing of how years can pass from a breakup, yet there’s an emotional and spiritual connection lingering with the last person you were with It’s not a coincidence thoughts and feelings ride the waves of your mind like great white whales finning through the ocean. This isn’t good when you’re trying to move on and be open to the person God has for you. The soul-tie has needs to be cut.

The consequence of not letting go is that you introduce a part of you that hasn’t moved on to the new love interest. This isn’t far to the individual or you. A pattern I face in meeting women is that they haven’t moved on from their last relationship. Getting to know someone by counseling them isn’t always a great feeling. I’m not complaining here, because I have a heart for people. I love helping others. A lesson I learned years ago was to heal before pursuing someone else.

Another unfortunate effect of a soul-tie is that you hurt yourself. Stabbing you in the heart by what could’ve been bruises the spirit. Torment is reliving something over and over that you can’t change. This isn’t of God. You’re not the best you when you’re damaged emotionally, psychologically and spiritually.  Your personality can’t shine through the dark clouds of insecurities. Moodiness, sensitivity, depression, lack of joy and peace, presents an inconsistency in your character. One day, people see when you’re up. Another day, they see when you’re down you. These are some signs that you’re struggling with something. As caring as any person is, it’s difficult to love someone romantically with these preexisting conditions.

Holding on also delays meeting the person God has for you. God is of order. He never invites confusion into your life. We know He’s not the author of confusion. The adversary is. Two questions to ask yourself are what does this soul-tie profit you? Is it God telling you to hold on or is it you telling yourself to?

Now that God has revealed the truth to you, cut the soul-tie.

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Faith, Honesty, How to Find Love, love, marriage, Melvin Davis, New Contemporary Romance, Patience, Relationships, romance, Romance/Love

God’s Confirmation vs An Emotional High Pt. II

Before I get into the message, I want to do something different this time. It’s my heart desire God speaks to you through the words He’s given me. I want you to be spirit fed and led rather than emotional fed and led. I want you to pray this prayer before you read further. I never want to give anyone false hope or have anyone believe there’s life in something God isn’t going to touch. Simply, because, it’s not His will. It’s my heart desire for you to experience everything in God’s will. There’s peace, joy, love, kindness, gentleness and more in God’s will. Relationships aren’t perfect because you aren’t. I say, posses what you’re requiring in someone else. I mean mentally, emotionally and spiritually. By keeping God first, all things are possible through Jesus Christ. All things.

Jesus, guide me by your spirit as I read this blog

Speak to my heart in ways that you never have before

Give me clarity and understanding about your will for my life

May confirmation and peace be with me when I’m done reading

Bless me with the wisdom to see your will during this time of my life

It’s you Jesus that I desire more than anything

It’s through You that all things are revealed

Open the eyes of my heart to see what you’re showing me in this blog

Show me your will about the person I have my eyes on

Remove from this relationship if it’s not what you desire for me

It’s in Jesus name that I pray, amen!

 

Determining if you met the love of your life is difficult when emotion is the only point of reference you have to confirm God’s will. I’m in no way suggesting feeling a deep interest, love or longing for someone is negative. Emotions are gift from God. It’s how we experience the humanity of a person. That’s the good and the bad. Feeling is an aspect of love. It’s passionate and breathtaking. However, as I pointed out moments ago, you need something more than feeling to confirm if you are or aren’t with the right person. Having an emotional high for someone without God ‘s confirmation can be devastating.

An emotional high prescribes the euphoria like your favorite romantic movie. The feeling of meeting someone with promising potential feels sublime. Everything feels right. I’m sure you’re well acquainted with early “good morning” texts from your love interest, along with some Christ-like words of encouragement. A.m., texts often leads to, in between afternoon texts and maybe, in between short phone conversations. Preferably around lunch time or a “bathroom break” or out getting “a whiff of fresh air.” Whatever is your vice is to get out of the office, house or chair, I understand. Those afternoon texts and short conversations will more than likely drift into evening and midnight conversation.  Midnight for some reason creates an atmosphere of transparency. Perhaps your guard is let down when the pressures and responsibilities of life are asleep in the wee hours of the morning. Candid conversation opens you up to exchange some of the most personal and intimate parts of your life. You talk about painful times of tribulation, lost and moments you felt like there was no other than God who pulled you through defying times. You also share memorable high points of your life. Like how God blessed you with the new career, how you started a business, or found a new church home. As the night turns into early morning, you end the call with a mutual feeling of excitement, renewed faith and hope. This newfound picture of life includes you two in it. You see each other spending life together in the most perfect, peaceful and Godly way. Optimism takes precedence as you sleep the 4 or 5 hours you have left to start the day.

Whether you’re aware of it or not, exchanging the matters and experiences of your heart is a way to build a soul-tie. There’s intimacy involved when you connect with someone in a spiritual and emotional way.  A bridge of closeness is coming together that creates just enough security and trust that you feel safe. You start to think, just maybe, I found someone special.  You’re ready to blow the trumpet and make the announcement to family and friends that you found the person you’ve been praying and waiting for. Oh, I forgot, that announcement is also extended to Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat, IG too, but that’s hold until you know it’s official. I’ve learned the hard lesson of premature announcements. You cringe behind door, asking yourself, what I tell those closest to me I found the love of my life. You feel embarrassed, stupid and ashamed. You ultimately feel like the “Donkey of the Day.” If you “named” it and “claimed” it, fine. It’s not too late to seek God’s will. You have the chance to stop the boat from sailing out too far in the sea. This is a time to pray. If you have been talking to someone for several months, with the intent to court, I suggest praying if you’re feeling unsure. If you’re engaged to someone, and you feel skeptical about this person, it’s not too late to seek God’s confirmation. Pray. If you married someone, without the peace and confirmation in your heart, pray. God loves you so much to see you live life outside of His will. There isn’t a need to feel ashamed. Most of the content in my blogs derive from personal experiences, but as Paul says so unashamedly to the church of Corinth, in 1 Corinthians 13:11, reflecting on life before his encounter first encounter with Christ, “When I was a child, I spoke as a child, and reason like a child. But when I became a man, I put away childish things.” Part of those childish things I put away was not moving forward with someone without God’s confirmation. I don’t care how good she looks, what accolades she has, people she knows, what she possesses materialistically or the kind of relationship she has with God, I’m seeking God’s confirmation before I become emotionally and spiritually invested. Time is a gift that cannot be squandered. I want to touch on a few key points of how God confirms His will to you It happens naturally and spiritually.  In part III, I will share the wisdom and knowledge God has blessed me with. I pray that you find them useful and applicable to your life.

 

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love

God’s Confirmation Vs An Emotional High Pt. I

 

When you see someone who looks like what your heart desires, before you call it love, check with God first. Pray, and He will reveal what you feel is a matter of pure attraction and emotion, or His peace that is the key that unlocks the confirmation you need in your spirit.-Melvin Davis

An emotional high is to be so overtaken by your emotions that it’s difficult for you see the truth of what God is saying about the person you’re pursuing. It’s taken me sometime to master this. When I was younger, I didn’t have the emotional maturity and intelligence I needed to avoid unnecessary experiences. I often got caught on the emotional high with a person. Back then, I equated physical attraction as someone who was God-sent. Whereas, because she was pleasing to the eye, she had to be pure, divine and the one. I’ve learned that beauty often comes with all kinds of destruction, dysfunctional and toxic behaviors that makes you ask yourself, how did I get entangled in this emotional web? When you don’t know who you are, you could easily fall into deception and mistaken attraction for confirmation. Think of people react when they see a celebrity. They lose it. Good looks does not translate into love. There’s nothing wrong with emotions or having emotions toward someone. It’s just important to be under control to see what God is showing you.

With emotional maturity comes the ability to wait and see what God has to say about the person you’re interested in before you become emotionally involved. Sounds like patience huh? It takes time to develop emotional maturity accompanied with patience. You want to know God’s truth about the person you have your eye on, pursuing or dating before you taken an emotional step into their life, and vice versa. I think it’s important to know what God has to say before you arrive to a point of dating. At least this is how God deals with me. If I see great potential, I ask God to reveal if she’s my wife. I’m sure you’re thinking, isn’t it too soon to ask of such a request. Well, I’m going to say no. As you get older in age, and mature in your relationship with God, you have better understanding and value of the importance of time. I’m no longer in a position to kill time with someone because I can. You should never be that lonely that you allow anyone to occupy your space for the sake of passing time.

Emotional maturity is really developed through spiritual discernment. Spiritual discernment is cultivated and enhanced as your relationship with God grows. Spiritual discernment is the ability to know what is and what is not of God. It’s the Holy Spirit leading and guiding you into all truth. Now, in the natural, there are various signs on the surface you could see that will determine if you met the one or not. They’re so visible you don’t have to pray about it. That’s what I want to write about in part II.

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love

Communication: The Making Or Breaking of a Relationship

Communication is extremely important in developing a relationship with someone. It sets the tone for the kind of connection, chemistry and understanding you’ll have of each other. How you communicate provides insight as to if you will remain an acquaintance or friends with your love interest or become something more. Unfortunately, poor communication is a reason why relationship never evolve or why couples call it quits. Communication can make or break a relationship.

There are various contributing factors to poor communication. Self-centeredness is one of them. It’s difficult communicating to someone when the attention is always on them—just about 99 % of the time. The 1% of the attention given to you comes in two questions. “Why are you so quiet? Or why aren’t you saying anything?” And I’m sure you’re thinking inside your head, “Because you’re self-centered,” but you don’t say anything out of fear of offending the person or creating an awkward atmosphere after. However, if you’re okay with having your attention drawn to a stage of someone’s world and existence, hearing more “I’s” than “We’s” used in a conversation, and consuming only their views, perspectives or interest, because yours doesn’t count, perhaps you shouldn’t say anything. Talking to someone who’s self-centered is draining. When the mind is idle in a way, that you aren’t using it to contribute or give input into a conversation, because what’s being said isn’t conducive to having a balance discussion, you’ll be left depleted. Self-centered people are often self-absorbed and selfish. This doesn’t suggest that they don’t have other positive qualities about them like ambition, a caring heart, business-savvy, successful, church going, etc.. It’s just that they aren’t conscious or considerate of your thoughts, feelings and personal interest, and no one may have told them so. If you’re dating someone who’s self-centered, you may want to ask yourself, do you want to fight to have balanced attention and conversation? Love can’t flow in self-centeredness.

Talking too much is another could also break a relationship. Now, if you do talk a lot, I’m not taking a shot at you. This isn’t the objective of this blog. I’m raising awareness to what communication is and what it looks like. There’s nothing wrong with being talkative, however, life is about balance. A conversation should have balance. Talking too much is forgetting that another person is in front of you, and they have an attention span. If you’re sitting in a classroom lecture, you are the sponge. But since, we’re talking about relationships, you shouldn’t feel you’re in a classroom lecture. The person you’re interested in may have something to say or someone where to go. Could personality lend to being overly talkative? I don’t think so. In my encounters, I find that some people just aren’t conscious that they do talk a lot or don’t have an understanding that communication also involves listening. It’s impossible to get to know someone if you’re always talking and talking too much. You could talk the attraction out of you and romantic interest out of someone, if you never for a second took time to engage them.

How amazing it would be to get into the heart, spirit and mind of someone else by asking questions? I enjoy engaging someone I’m interested in. I ask questions. Lots of questions. To know a person is to ask questions. To know a person is to listen. To love a person to know their heart and who they are in God. You wouldn’t know these things if the attention is always on you and your overly talkative. Invite someone on your stage and give them a mic, then ask, tell me what you’re passionate about or what stirs you or how do you feel about x, y, z. And I dear you to let them finish without cutting them of and drawing the attention back to you.

Having absolutely nothing to say isn’t so appealing either. What’s a conversation without the other person ever knowing what’s going on inside your head. Saying nothing could give the impression that you aren’t confident, you are uncomfortable or awkward. These are the last things you want running through another person head while they’re giving you the blank stare. Say you may not be interested or well versed in a particular subject, I would still find an angle to interject. Ask questions and find ways to link what’s being said to what you know. What’s going upstairs in your head maybe the last words you have actually never said if you’re too quiet or not talkative.

I developed a kind of intuition over the years that I know when to speak or listen. I just know when I’m talking to a listener or a talker who doesn’t have an ear to listen because they’re so fired up to get back on the horse and ride again. I can also tell if a person is or isn’t attentive. I can feel it and see it. I’m not a person who’s overly talkative, but there are moments when God is like, Melvin, stop talking. It’s time to listen. Or, speak, you have done enough listening. I instinctively pickup on visual and audio cues of when to speak or listen. Spiritually speaking, I credit my instincts to the Holy Spirit. He’s given me to the ability to discern when to speak or listen. Communication is about balance. Many people have the idea that communication is only speaking. Communication is listening too.

You may find the last point I want to highlight funny. It’s a term I came up with…not sure if anyone has used it. If so, oh well. A ninja is someone who cuts you off before you could answer their question or elaborate on whatever it is that you’re talking about. Let’s take a look at this dialogue.

At the movies, the person you’re on a date with is talking throughout the entire movie. The lights come and they “So how was the movie?”

You lips move to respond. “I like…”

“I really like when the guy jumped off the roof and kicked him in the face. What did you like about the end?

Your lips move to respond.

“The ending should’ve been better,” your date responds.

You get the idea? The ninja slices and dices and gives you two back hands before you get a word out. Frustrating huh? Let’s a deeper look to how toxic this can be.

The root of being cut by a ninja is self-centeredness. Since self-centeredness is the root, the person is overly talkative. Hence, being too talkative is the result of being cut off in a conversation before you could get a word out. This can be irritating and makes you not want to bother talking. Draining huh?

Of course they are exceptions when it comes to likeminded and behavioral-like people. I will add tolerance too. Too people who are self-centered may work. I’m not sure how, for the reason they’ll be fighting for the spotlight. But hey, anything is possible. Two talkative people in a relationship could work as well. I’m sure you know some. You may have the tolerance to date a ninja. Perhaps you don’t mind slicing and dicing them back to get a word or approaching the conversation like double-dutch. It’s about finding your match. Excellent communication sustains long and healthy relationships.

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